39:We Are Family

August 16

“Oh, God, it is sooo good to see you!”  Charlie pulled Izzie into a bone-crushing hug, thankful that her friend and “sister” was able to attend the impromptu family dinner. 

The last Sunday of August was more than a full week after the boys’ departure to see their father before continuing on to Stanford.   Since her parents weren’t going let them get out of a family dinner that easily, they had declared this Sunday as Del Vecchio dinner day with plans to send them off in Italian style.   

When Charlie received her mom’s call with official orders to be there with the boys or be disowned, she had immediately texted Izzie.  It was funny how effective an empty suicide threat was with a psychiatrist.  She swore at Charlie, but promised that she would be there, with her proverbial couch in tow.

There was really no need for the couch, but Charlie was itching to see the other woman in the worst possible way – and maybe talk just a little bit about her vacation.  After two days back in the city, she was ready to re-hash the best parts of it with her friend.

“Hey!  Cute dress.” 

The hug was returned with a laugh before Izzie stepped back to take in Charlie’s blue and white “sex against the guest house” dress.  The one that she might have chosen as a not-so-subtle way of clinging to those best parts. 

Izzie was rocking her usual psychiatrist style with conservative khaki capris, a black tee and black flat sandals.  It suited her and felt as familiar to Charlie as the house they were standing in.

“Thanks.  You look great, too!”

“I look okay, but nothing like you.  Something about the Hamptons must have agreed with you.”

Tucking one corner of her mouth into a smirk, Charlie was very conscious of Izzie’s family crowding through the front door and the other Del Vecchios milling through the house.  She kept it simple and vague until they could find get away from everyone and talk alone. 

“It was a good vacation.”

“Aunt Charlie!”  The cry came in unison from Izzie’s girls, who technically weren’t related to Charlie but were as much her nieces as Sydney was.

“Cassie!  Maggie!”  She swept the eleven- and nine-year-old dark-haired cuties into her arms for bear hugs.  “You two have grown up so much since I last saw you!  Mommy is going to have to bring you around more often.”

“Charlie.”  Aaron was the next to step into her arms, and she greeted him with genuine affection.  He was a good guy and she didn’t think there could’ve been a better man to step up and fill her little brother’s shoes in Izzie’s life. 

When Aaron had moved down the reception line to Charlie’s mother, it made room for the last member of Izzie’s family to pass through the door and…

“Oh, God.”  In an instinctive response to the handsome young man who now stood significantly taller than she did, Charlie’s eyes filled with tears.  She hadn’t seen her nephew in a few months and, as teenagers are prone to do, he had changed dramatically.  Only instead of seeing that her nephew Joseph was growing up, she slipped into a time warp to come face-to-face with Joey.  “You look just like your dad did when he first met your mom.”

Joseph was looking distinctly uncomfortable and uncertain of how to respond, making her feel like an idiot for becoming so overwhelmed by her own thoughts.  Wrapping her arms around him with a laugh, she sniffled away the tears and gave a hard, brief squeeze. 

“Weird aunt moment over,” she promised when releasing him.  “It’s good to see you, kiddo.  Noah and Caleb are out back hiding from adults.  After that, you’ll probably want to do the same.”

“Thanks, Aunt Charlie.”

His awkward grin was even like Joey’s, and the tears bubbled up anew as she watched him lumber off to find his cousins.

“You okay?” Izzie asked quietly, having seen the exchange in the midst of the typical Del Vecchio madness.  When this many Italians gathered in the same place, crazy didn’t begin to describe the noise and buzz of activity. 

“How do you stand it, Iz?”  Just from spending a minute with the boy, Charlie’s heart ached like it hadn’t in years.  She couldn’t imagine looking at Joey’s reincarnation day after day and being continually reminded of what they’d lost.  It would cripple her.

“He’s not a ghost, Charlie.  He’s my son, and I can tell the difference because I forgave myself a long time ago.  You still haven’t.”

Maybe not forgive, but she’d thought she was doing okay at forgetting.  Her nights were no longer filled with the repetitive nightmares that played out in slow motion.  Her days were no longer spent obsessing over a million different possible scenarios in which she could’ve, would’ve, should’ve done something – anything ­– different.  Whatever thing that might alter the outcome and leave her with four living brothers.

“Mom’s gonna die when she sees him.”

“She already did and didn’t bat an eye.  You’re the only one who sees Joey because you’re the only one who thinks he blames you for what happened.”

This little scene was shattering Charlie’s delusion that she didn’t need a psychiatrist’s couch, and was also ruining her post-vacation buzz.  Izzie was coerced into coming here because Charlie wanted to abstractly relive the best sex of her life.  Buried guilt and regrets weren’t on the agenda. 

“Yes, Dr. Cosso,” she agreed with a smile and wiped the corners of her eyes.  “Let’s go see what Mom and Dom need help with in the kitchen.”

“Charlie.”  Izzie grabbed her elbow before she could get away, and two pairs of brown eyes connected well below surface-level.  “He would hate knowing that, after all these years, you still can’t think of him with a smile instead of tears.  Forgive yourself, already.  It’s what he would want.”

Her throat closed off so tightly that she couldn’t speak – or even swallow.  She just nodded, knowing that Izzie was right and wishing that knowledge could alleviate the heaviness in her heart.

J J J J J

It was a relatively small group this time around.  Her parents were there, of course, along with Charlie and her boys, Luke, Sydney, Dom, Vivi and Izzie and company.  Other than that, it was just Vince and Anna.  Their two kids were in their mid-twenties with active lives and families that were unable to accommodate today’s last-minute family gathering.  And Owen was, well…  Not here.

She would be hard pressed to find one person who was sorry about that.  Through the years, things had become progressively more strained between him and her family – particularly Luke – and he had never been comfortable in the big, boisterous family setting anyway.  Owen was the only child of older parents and had grown up in solitude and quiet.  He never quite got the hang of this group and they’d soon lost interest in helping him try. 

“Remind me again where Owen is?”  her mother inquired during a lull in conversation around the table. 

Juliana Del Vecchio was a warm, wonderful human being  – if a bit opinionated.   What seventy-five year old wasn’t, though, Charlie was coming to find out.  Look at Millie, for example.  She was only seventy-two and every bit as opinionated as Juliana.  Charlie’s father Edward, at seventy-seven bordered on obnoxious and didn’t care if you wanted to hear what he had to say or not.  He felt it his God-given right to tell you, anyway.

She and her brothers were screwed.  In their forties, there wasn’t one of them who was reserved about voicing a point of view.  They would all be insufferable once they hit their seventies. 

“He’s helping a friend set up a recording studio in Canada and filling in as a studio musician for a while.”

When he first broached the subject four months ago, she wasn’t sure he’d been telling the truth.  When the bank statement began showing Canadian debit card transactions, she decided it might be.  In all honesty, it was irrelevant.  She had her boys and a new brownstone that he hadn’t sullied with his presence, so he was more than welcome to stay in Canada for the next four years as far as she was concerned.

“Fucking putz.”

Pointing her fork tines at the source of that muttered comment, Charlie ordered, “Don’t start, Luca.”

“Ask Charlie who we hung out with in the Hamptons.” 

The arrogant son of a bitch!  As though his soapbox sermon on vacation wasn’t enough.  As though whatever mystery issue he’d caused with Jon wasn’t enough, now he was going to flagrantly parade this crap across the dining room table?  He was on the verge of brotherly excommunication.

“I’ll bite.”  This from Vince, who was seated next to Charlie with his arm along the back of her chair.  He tipped his chin in her direction and asked, “Who’d you hang out with?”

Glaring at Luke, she advised coldly, “Ask Luke, since he’s obviously the one who thinks it worth mentioning.”

With the exception of Noah and Caleb, who knew the answer to this question, everyone’s eyes shifted to the Del Vecchio who smirked evilly around the rim of his wine glass.  The moron was probably drunk, she thought, since he admitted he overdrank to dull the effect of certain yapping family members.

“Jon Bon Jovi and his family.”

“Oh, for the love of-“  The rest of her swear was lost in Vivi’s squeal.  While the rest of them weren’t squealing, their interest was disruptive enough to also camouflage the choice names she threw at her brother.  If he wasn’t doing this for spite, then demonic possession is the only other reason he could possibly want to open that can of worms in front of their nosy sister-in-law.

Vivi wasn’t even content to be spastic on her own.  Poor Anna and Izzie were being dragged along for the ride, receiving full details on some YouTube videos of Jon’s performance at the private event she'd squirreled her way into last month.  There was also something about private events in the Hamptons recently, but Charlie wasn't paying attention.

 “The man is sex on a stick,” was Vivi’s expert assessment to anyone who would listen, while Izzie watched Charlie with a barely repressed laugh.  “A silver-haired man should not possess that much testosterone, and he was just so… nice when he and I talked.  A lovely gentleman.”

“Talked”?  Don’t you mean “stalked”, pit bull? 

“Mom?” 

Sweet Mary, thank you.

A sane voice in the midst of the idiocy was music to Charlie’s ears.  She loved her eldest child to the moon and back with a side trip to Jupiter in this moment.

“What, Noah?”

“What’s the big deal?  Why is she going psycho over Jesse’s dad?”

Charlie almost wasn’t able to swallow the groan.  The only way she managed it was by telling herself that he didn’t know.  He wasn’t trying to make her life miserable by making her expound on a topic that she wanted to avoid like the plague.  He just truly didn’t know, she repeated while gulping half a glass of wine. 

“Mr. Bongiovi is a musician,” she explained to him and her parents while Vivi yapped, Luke grinned like the village idiot, Izzie looked like the cat that swallowed the canary and everyone else waited to hear the punch line of this tale.  “I used to play CDs of his band in the car.  ‘Living on a Prayer’, ‘Wanted Dead or Alive’, ‘It’s My Life’.  Surely you remember those.”

Exchanging a look with Caleb, Noah sat up in his chair and clarified, “So he’s not Mister Bongiovi, he’s Mister Bon… Jovi?  That Bon Jovi?”

“Yes.” 

“Well, that sucks.  If I’d known I would’ve gotten a picture or autograph or something.”

“I got mine!” Luke the Lush chimed in, digging for his phone. 

“As you might have figured out from what Noah said,” Charlie explained to the non-drunk or crazy members of their dinner party.  “He and Caleb met Mr. Bongiovi’s sons on the beach and they became friends.  As a result, we spent some time with the family.  It isn’t nearly as spectacular as Luke obviously wants you to believe.”

Her explanation was perfectly reasonable and had nothing to do with Jon or Charlie.  They were merely dragged into a group playdate and her family should all – except for Izzie – accept that easily enough.  If Luke wasn’t passing around a selfie taken at the Can Do Awards Dinner two weeks before the Hamptons, maybe that’s exactly what would’ve happened.

“Since I know Luke isn't gonna wear a suit in the Hamptons,” Vince observed.  “When was this?”

“Oh, some dinner Charlie dragged me to.  Meeting him was the only decent damn thing about it.  Everything else was boring as hell.”

“Wow,” Anna admired, passing his phone over to Aaron.  “So you guys are hobnobbing with the rich and famous.  I suppose you have his phone number and all that, too?”

The question was intended to be a joke.  Charlie knew that from the laughter and her sister-in-law’s lack of interest in the answer, but it didn’t change facts.  Jon’s number was a part of both Charlie and Luke’s contact lists now.

With a loud clearing of her throat, Izzie pushed back her chair with a bright smile.  “Juliana, what can I do to help with dessert?  Maggie, Cassie help clear the dinner plates, please.  Joseph, start loading the dishwasher.  Luke, can I talk to you in the kitchen, please?  Aaron and I are thinking of doing some renovations and I’d like your opinion.”

That maneuver earned a dose of Charlie’s love equivalent to what had been bestowed upon Noah a moment ago.  Anything to shut Luke’s mouth before he told every damn thing he knew and half of what he guessed to be true.

Gratefully extending her arm for the wine, she tipped the bottle against the lip of her glass as Anna indulged Vivi by listening to the recount of Jon’s gray hair and lovely manners.   Her dad and Dom were discussing NFL pre-season with Aaron, her boys had disappeared into the back yard again and everyone else was in the kitchen. 

Charlie had escaped a familial disaster by the skin of her teeth.  It called for a little extra vino and a silent celebration of her good fortune.

That celebration was a little premature, as it turned out.

“So tell me about Jon Bon Jovi.”  If that wasn’t the same tone Vince used to lull a suspect into spilling his guts, Charlie would eat his smelly socks.  Luke had planted a seed and now Vince was planning to cultivate it and see how it grew. 

“I could actually tell you more about his niece and nephew, or his sister-in-law.  That’s who Nana and I spent most of our time with.  Cute kids.  The little boy is about Gracie’s age.  How is she, by the way?  I haven’t seen pictures lately.”

She crossed her fingers in her lap to exonerate herself from the lie and hoped Vince follow the rabbit trail scented with his two-year-old granddaughter’s name. That little girl was the apple of her grandpa’s eye, and he usually didn’t waste an opportunity to extoll her toddler virtues.

“Good.  Anna will show you the latest.”  He wasn’t biting and she cursed the damn police training for his hawkish eyes tracking her like prey.  “Why was Luca so determined to bring that up and tie your name to it?”

“Because he’s drunk?” 

Which no longer seemed like such a flaw in Luke’s character.  In fact, it seemed like a genius plan to get through the rest of this blessed occasion.  One of the boys could drive her home.

“I find that drunk perps are a hell of a lot more forthcoming than sober ones.”

Plunking her glass back onto the table, Charlie refilled it and regarded her brother with impatience.  “Take a moment and recall who you’re talking to, Vincent – the woman whom you taught at a very early age to bust a guy’s balls if he was busting mine.  That means you’re not going to intimidate or lead me into telling you whatever fact or fiction you think is living in Luca’s head.  You got something to say, say it, but stop chasing figments of your imagination.”

There was a sliver of silent standoff before a rueful grin stole over his face.  Leaning forward, he hooked his arm around Charlie’s neck and tugged so that he could plant a chuckling kiss on her forehead.  “I love you, kid.”

All of them loved her in their own ways.  Charlie knew that, and while she was closest to Luke before this Hamptons fiasco, Vince had always been her chief protector.  He took his role as a big brother more seriously than the other two, and if he even suspected something wasn't right in her world, out came the bad ass cop routine.

It’s probably why she was closer to Luke.  She’d always been afraid Vince would discover her secret, so she kept some distance between them.  If he found out… 

You'll figure out how to make it right before then.  You have to.

“Back at you, Kojak.”  She petted his cheek with an affectionate palm.  “Now stop pretending our brother isn’t an idiot.”